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 Jokes..Jokes 11

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tommy.irene

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PostSubject: Jokes..Jokes 11   Sat Nov 17, 2012 8:58 am

A man is in bed with his Thai girlfriend. After having great sex, she spends the next hour just stroking his p*nis, something she had lovingly done on many occasions.

Rather enjoying it, he turns and asks her:

'Why do you love doing that?'

she replies:

'Because I really miss mine'.

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Sat Nov 17, 2012 10:01 pm

affraid cheers cheers cheers lol!

Again so true over there.


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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Sun Nov 18, 2012 8:44 am

Sign on company bulleting board: “This firm requires no physical-fitness program. Everyone gets enough exercise jumping to conclusions, flying of the handle, running down the boss, flogging dead horses, knifing friend in the back, dodging responsibility, and pushing their luck.”

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Sun Nov 18, 2012 10:45 pm

Very Happy Laughing Laughing Laughing cheers lol!


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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Mon Nov 19, 2012 8:25 am

A pretty blonde was ticketed in economy class for a flight from London to Sydney. A few minutes into the flight, she got out of her seat, found an empty seat in first class, and sat down.

The flight attendant came and said "Miss, I'm sorry, but you are ticketed for economy class, and I'm afraid you'll have have return to your designated seat".

The blonde retorts "I'm blonde, beautiful, and I'm flying first class to Sydney". "No", the flight attendant replied, "you cannot sit in first class, I'm sorry".

After some arguing, the flight attendant entered the cockpit and said, "Captain, I have blonde woman from economy class who insists on sitting in first.. I can't seem to convince her to go back to her seat, can you help?".

Captain says, "Oh, no problem... my wife is blonde .. I speak blonde.. just a moment".

The captain gets up and whispers in the blonde's ear. "Oh", she says, "I'm very sorry, I didn't know", and returns to her seat in economy class.

Captain returns to the cockpit, followed by the flight attendant. "Wow! What did you say to her?", the flight attendant asks.

"Oh, simple... I just told her first class isn't going to Sydney".

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Tue Nov 20, 2012 4:01 am

cheers cheers cheers cheers geek lol!


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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Wed Nov 21, 2012 8:47 am

The Traffic Warden's funeral
As the coffin was being lowered into the ground at a Traffic Warden's funeral a voice from inside screams "I'm not dead, I'm not dead. Let me out!"
The Vicar smiles, leans forward sucking air through his teeth and mutters
"Too late my friend, the paperwork's already done"

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Wed Nov 21, 2012 11:34 pm

cheers cheers What a Face cheers lol!

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Thu Nov 22, 2012 5:00 am

A white guy is walking along a beach when he comes across a lamp partially buried in the sand. He picks up the lamp and gives it a rub.
Two blonde genies appear, and they tell him he has been granted three wishes.
The guy makes his three wishes and the blonde genies disappear.
The next thing the guy knows, he's in a bedroom, in a mansion, surrounded by 50 beautiful women. He makes love to all of... them and begins to explore the house. Suddenly he feels something soft under his feet. He looks down and notices the floor is covered in $100 bills.
Next, there's a knock at the door, so he answers it!
Standing there are two persons dressed in Ku Klux Klan outfits.
They drag him outside to the nearest tree, throw a rope over a sturdy limb, and hang him by the neck until he's dead.
As the Klansmen are walking away, they remove their hoods. It's the two blonde genies!
One blonde genie says to the other, "I can understand the first wish--having all those beautiful women in a big mansion to make love to. I can also understand him wanting to be a millionaire.
But, why he wanted to be hung like a black man is beyond me."

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Thu Nov 22, 2012 1:17 pm

cheers cheers cheers cheers cheers lol!

Excellent

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Sun Nov 25, 2012 5:48 am

The Top Ten Differences Between Cats & Dogs:
10. Dogs come when you call them. Cats take a message and get back to you when they are good and ready.
9. Dogs will let you give them a bath without taking out a contract on your life.
8. Dogs will bark to wake you up if the house is on fire. Cats will quietly sneak out the back door.
7. Dogs will bring you your slippers or the evening newspaper.Cats might bring you a dead mouse.
6. Dogs will play Frisbee with you all afternoon. Cats will take a three-hour nap.
5. Dogs will sit on the car seat next to you. Cats have to have their own private box or they will not go at all.
4. Dogs will greet you and lick your face when you come home from work. Cats will be mad that you went to work at all.
3. Dogs will sit, lie down, and heel on command. Cats will smirk and walk away.
2. Dogs will tilt their heads and listen whenever you talk. Cats will yawn and close their eyes.
1. Dogs will give you unconditional love forever. Cats will make you pay for every mistake you've ever made since the day you were born.

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Sun Nov 25, 2012 11:46 pm

cheers cheers cheers cheers lol!


Very true.

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Tue Nov 27, 2012 7:24 am

A man who was just about to be executed was asked whether he would like to have a last smoke.
The man answered, "No thank you, I don't smoke. I don't want to get lung cancer."

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Fri Nov 30, 2012 5:36 am

A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him an exam and found nothing physically wrong with him. “Listen,” the doctor said, “if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you need to stop taking your troubles to bed with you.”
“It’s true,” said the patient, “but my wife refuses to sleep alone.”

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes..Jokes 11   Sat Dec 01, 2012 12:18 am

cheers cheers cheers Very Happy Very Happy cheers affraid

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